I want cool episode titles like Psych

I detest having Epstein-Barr Virus. I know, I know, there are way worse chronic things to have, or I could have cancer, but I don't. This is my "chronic illness," and you will shut up and let me deal with it. It's not fair. I don't want it, I never wanted it. If I can fight through mono without realizing it, and force myself to beat sports asthma, why do I still have to deal with this? I can't be me with it. I can't keep going, and going anymore. You'd think I know this after 2 and 1/2 years, but apparently I don't. I forget that I have it, and then it wipes me out. All I want to do is sleep, and I can't, and don't. Because it's summer and I need my freedom.

One of my really good friends is away at ROTC combat training. I'm pretty much in awe of him for being able to do that all day for two weeks, so maybe I can convince myself to wake up early tomorrow and go workout for an hour before work. If John can do hand-to-hand combat for four hours, I can lift some weights and torture myself some with some running and pushups.

I have a friend moving to China in a few weeks, and he wants to see me before he leaves. That would be completely cool, if he wasn't my ex-boyfriend. It's still really awkward between us, and I just don't want to make him think there's anything between us, because there isn't, and even if there was, it's CHINA. I can't handle the idea of a relationship between states, much less countries and continents.

I just don't know anymore. There's so much I want to achieve this summer, and I worry I won't achieve any of it. Please help. I just want to get in glorious shape so I can feel better, I want to be young, and free, and optimistic, and wonderful. I want to be tan, and happy, and competent at my job, and a great swim lesson teacher. I want to live my life to the fullest. I want to come back to school completely happy with everything I did. I want to put an end to the drama that's been going on for 7 years, even if it's not a happy ending. I WANT AN ENDING. and I want a million new beginnings.

i eat/sleep/breathe/dream/live HMNS camp supplies

today i have:

• gotten a blood blister from fixing shelf heights.
• help fill 3 shopping carts completely full of camp supplies
• help get all that stuff through a checkout lane.....and helped spend almost $2000 dollars. OMG.
• said goodbye to John before he goes to Combat Training.....to whoever is in charge of that: if you kill/hurt my movie watching date so we can't see awesome movies together, i will hunt you down. but hey, at least John will be able to teach hand-t0-hand combat and lots of other cool stuff by the time he comes home
• WATCHED INDIANA JONES 4! everyone should go see it, then come back and get excited with me about the love interest, because i was super excited to see her! and tell me what you think about it all!
• gotten a HMNS email address. children, i am very official now.
  

"Parents Get Sad When We Send Dead Kids Home"

True fact. My first day of work was today, with the lovely bonus of Epi-Pen/Preventing Disease Transmission ARC training downtown. (BOO! HISS!)

I spent all morning looking for things to go in unit boxes. And I'm overwhelmed. So overwhelmed I can't think what I wanted to say. But I got a lunch break. And got to put posters up in classrooms.

Driving downtown sucks. If things were marked, Houston, I could get places on time. But no, you would rather assume I know things way before I'm supposed to, so you can mock me with signs at the last minute when I can't get over. Not appreciated. But I survived the trip down, and even got back without using directions and depending soley on my innate inner compass. And the realization if I headed north, I'd hit the major downtown part, and some sign there would direct me to I-45 North, and it turned out I was correct.

I met someone who had an internship at the HMNS a few years ago, and now she's on staff. I would love for that to happen to me one day. But really, I'm working in a well-known museum. This is the best summer job ever!

Lambs in the Woodlands

I went to the woodlands mall w/ KathyO today, and it was pretty awesome. I mean, who else goes to a "chocolate bar" at 3pm? We got delicious food and i got some free milkshake from the cashier guy. weird? yes! delicious? OF COURSE. How it happened: KathyO and I are sitting eating our ice cream and cupcake, and talking about life. We're both looking around the place, which is pretty much empty, and I always seem to catch the eye of the cashier. Anyway, we're talking, laughing, i'm talking with my hands to prove points, and suddenly the cashier shows up with a little glass of milkshake and offers it to me. I think I stared at him like he was crazy, so he explained it was leftover from another milkshake and he thought I would like it. So i thanked him and drank it. It was delicious, but weird to get a free shake from a guy. And we went to Museum where I'm working, and walked through it to look at all the exhibits so I can see it all, and had a blast. There's a cute manager there, and he's in charge of the Paleo Prep Lab...which is working on a real dinosaur skeleton, and it's so cool. I asked what they were doing, and he explained it all, and the story ends with me getting an application to volunteer to work on it, and his card to call him to tell him when I'm bringing it up. I'm pretty excited. SERIOUSLY excited....a real dinosaur skeleton!! and a chance to do real archeology lab work!!!

The police were at my neighbors' house tonight, and they were scoping out the house and checking all the doors and windows, so my mom and sister and I went outside to see what was going on. And because we know the neighbors. Apparently, the panic button on the alarm keypad inside was pressed, so the police were called, but no one was answering the door. So they asked us if we knew anything about it, and we didn't really. They had the alarm company try to call the family, but there wasn't an answer. Anyway, they eventually left, and everything is fine. But it was weird, kinda like my very own taste of a L&O episode.

I start working Wednesday....get excited. I need to go lunch shopping tomorrow, and turn in my check at the bank...which hopefully means getting to see cute bank guy..yay. he's fun to talk to, and I haven't seen him since New Year's, so we have some catching up to do.

Grades:

ALL A'S. INCLUDING CHILDREN'S LIT AND CHILD PSYCH!!! YAY!!!!

and an incomplete in Independent Study Botany....but I don't know why.

Now summer can officially begin!!! YAY!

Work starts tomorrow in 12 hours...keep some fingers crossed for me. I'm pretty nervous, but really excited. I'm all excited to be a real museum employee.

Jack, I miss you. Come home. I went to dinner at a Bar-B-Que place tonight, and I think you would've liked it. And I had Chocolate Raspberry Truffle ice cream tonight, and I loved it!

Things I Think About (summer edition)

thing one: Silence of the Lambs is on, and I'm watching it, even though it'll freak me out the next time I'm alone in someplace dark. This happens all the time, even though I've seen the movie before. Gullible, thy name is Becca.

things two and three: I start work Saturday, even though i was told I wouldn't start until the second week of June, or the week before. As long as I'm paid by the hour, I'm a happy girl though. I get to wear jeans to work everyday, and a Museum Tshirt.....which I don't own. I have a feeling I'll have a ton by the end of May though.

thing four: My best friend and sometime boyfriend Jack (a pseudonym, but clever....ask me about it sometime) is spending his summer working in Ft. Stockton TX. He spends 3 weeks there, 1 week home. He'll be working in a courthouse, doing research to determine who owns the minerals of a given piece of land. (Apparently you can sell the top, but own the minerals....who knew?)

thing five: DUDE! The Scholastic Book Fair Warehouse is AH-MAZING! my mom and I spent $200 dollars on books, but we got a TON! I have some awesome picture books, and some good chapter books, and OH MY GOODNESS, please buy me one for my birthday. I love it. I'd list what I got, but I doubt anyone cares. If you do: Judy Moody, Clementine, Junie B. Jones, Magic Treehouse, Amelia Bedelia, Olivia, Alice the Fairy, some of the (letter) is for (something) books...AWESOME, and lots of other cool ones. but no Knufflebunny....life sure isn't fair.

thing six: If I was braver, I'd start a blog about all the crazy situations I'd get in with boys. Because really, someone should learn from my mistakes, because I'm clearly NOT it. And then I could justify any future ones as fodder for the blog, or advice for someone else. AND( I'm aware this isn't correct English, but I thought it in my head), I could make up names for them. How exciting!!

thing seven: Jack's planning on using some of his paychecks to but my jewelry. I'm thinking James Avery, but what?? I do like this ring: faith, hope, love....but I have no other things I love, other than the jewelry with stars. Ideas are welcomed!

Things to Remember (moving edition)

1. saving random stuff you think you might need is NOT a smart idea.
2. storage units are worth the price
3. if you have a small car, DON'T TAKE TOO MUCH HOME.
4. it's advisable to be able to see out your back windows when driving in Dallas.
5. there is really nothing cool about the Arbuckle Mountains, stop wanting to take pictures.
6. make cool mix CD's to rock out to.
7. the SBux at Exit 496B is DELICIOUS.

moving home doesn't mean that it'll feel like home.